COMMENTARY

Daryl Wood

(Daryl is a fivefold teacher on the Kingdomquest apostolic team.)

UNFILTERED

One of the most defining characteristics of the quality of any relationship is the degree to which the involved parties filter their communication.

As trust and security grows between two or more individuals, that certain degree of guardedness that used to accompany their dialogue progressively dissolves. Comments, and the responses that follow them, become more free and spontaneous. The need to carefully measure and weigh each word to avoid potential misunderstandings is alleviated by a confidence that the relationship itself is stable enough to endure it, even if the other party potentially "takes things the wrong way."

Eventually, if a friendship connection is sufficiently strengthened, those who are relating achieve a true rest in the presence of one another. There are no longer the times of awkward silence. There is no longer care exerted to be politically correct in expression of thought. As one shares of himself with another, he is comfortable knowing that he is not on "probation"; he is already received by the other.

While this description might sound a bit idealistic to some, it actually serves as the delineating mark between true friendships and what are merely "close acquaintances." Sadly, many have never tasted the former. They may have been introduced to others whom they would like to think are their friends. However, if there are never any free and substantive exchanges of life, then the human links that do exist are every bit as hollow as unused dinner straws.

Some may wonder what possible relevance this commentary has concerning the advancement of the Kingdom of God. Yet few topics could carry more importance. The God who called Abraham "friend" (James 2:23) and David "a man after My own heart" (Acts 13:22) longs for honest, free communication with those whom He has created, and between them as well. Because this subject touches His very essence, God pursued Adam when fellowship with him was lost, as he sought to cover his own nakedness.

It is hard to avoid noticing the ritualistic means that many employ in their efforts to pray "properly." When "Gracious Heavenly Father," "In Jesus’ Name, Amen," and other essential catch-phrases frame a rigid template from which all communication with the Lord must be initiated, it hints of a view of God that is both stiff and unapproachable. (I am not advocating a flippant casualness in our communication with God when I say this. He is to be feared, just as He is to be loved. Still, the One who urged us to come boldly before His throne of grace is not "stuffy," nor is He looking to keep anyone at arm’s length from Himself due to a "technicality" in word choice—and all the more so one crafted through religious traditions of men.)

People tend to relate to God in much the same way that they relate to one or more significant others in their lives. For example, one’s relationship with his earthly father often molds much of his view of his Heavenly Father, as many have noted. Though to perhaps a lesser extent, this goes on with other human associations as well.

The parallels are quite clear. "If someone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? And this commandment we have from Him: that he who loves God must love his brother also (1 John 4:20, 21)."

The link between the vertical connection with God and the horizontal connections with one’s brothers and sisters in Christ is pronounced. The impact of each upon the other is also unavoidable. "Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift (Matt. 5: 23, 24)."

Without mutual and resolute commitments to do all that we can to keep our relations with the other members of the Father’s family free and clear of offense, the corporate experience of God’s presence will be reduced to a mere trickle flow. I am convinced that this is why I, and I am sure countless others, have often witnessed the Lord moving much more consistently and substantially in small, intimate gatherings than in larger ones. He absolutely requires that we be real with Him and with others before He can abide with us. The more people that are involved in a particular gathering, the more effort this will entail. Unfortunately, in lieu of honest, forthright, and often private communication between those who have differences, slanderous whisperings and backbiting is commonplace. This is not His way, nor will He not set His approval on gatherings where such behavior is tolerated.

"Now may the God of patience and comfort grant you to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus, that you may with one mind and one mouth glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore receive one another, just as Christ also received us, to the glory of God (Rom. 15: 5-7)."

Before there can be the like-mindedness in God’s people that results in their thinking and speaking in unison to glorify Him, there is a prerequisite that must be met. Those who would call on the Lord together must first receive one another in the same fashion that Christ has individually received them. They must roll out the "welcome mats," and truly embrace one another from their hearts. Where this is impossible, due either to offenses or some other conflictive issues, all are required to pursue the necessary steps to remove any blockages that would prohibit an authentic sharing of life with one another.

Until those who would gather together grasp the critical aspect of this requirement, their relationships—both with the Lord and with one another—will remain very superficial at best. The communication and the fellowship will be homogenized, pasteurized, and carefully filtered . . . at the cost of life.